| i should be doing hw but i dont feel like it ^^; hahah...
fasdfa;sdfals;fjlasdfjl; i wanna wushu so bad... but since i've been a
gimp, i've been going to the gym instead. btw running on treadmills =
so much easier than running on ur own outside! a mile feels like
nothing now... :) hmm what else... two more weeks until break! i need
to get through this final crunch and keep my grades where they are T_T
.. haha.....
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| have you ever been torn apart? aaaaah, the internal struggle between academic responsibility and self-enjoyment...
soooooooooo ......... my knee was actually a lot worse that i thought... western doctor suspects that i've torn my acl (it's really common) and so i'll need to get an mri... if necessary i might need surgery. T_T kinda scary but it's just some standard procedure or w/e... but if i do have surgery, then that will take 6 months to recover! holy bajeebers! it's already been 2 months without wushu and i dont know how i'd survive another half year!
so what really bugs me is that (1) i cant compete at berkeley tournament in march, (2) i cant train for beans, (3) i possibly cant go to china next year!!!!! noooooooooooooooooo!! i was hella looking forward to it tooo!!! unless i go later on in the summer, but i dont know if most people would be gone by then.. T_T
so my other option is to try out for this 8-week internship. it would be perfect for my future + career + resume + everything practical, and i'd learn a lot and whatever, give me a headstart in college... yaddiya but it's still like *groan* cause who the crazy would choose a practical, learning experience over the best time of ur life in china?!? and i'm upset because summer after senior year should be like super duper fun, not super duper nerdy.
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| a new revelation about wushu
i've been out of wushu for six or seven weeks now because of my
injured knee. so fortunately (or unfortunately) i've had a lot of time
to reflect on why i got injured, what i'm doing wrong, how i can
improve at a faster rate, why i'm not reaching my goals, and so forth.
so this break from training four to five times a week has actually been
somewhat beneficial. :D it sucks that my knee cracks sometimes
T_T and that the muscles behind my knee are still injured.. and
that my endurance is now like nada.. but i'm hoping that when i start
training more, i'll be able to improve faster because i've thought
everything over ^^;
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| if God's really out there, then he's playing with my emotions right now.
all-time low right now.
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| !!!!!!!!
who's frustrated by college apps?!?!
gaaaaah >__< i know it's still somewhat early, but ... (1) inputting the same info over and over again is super tiring... (2) college essays ..wow can u say writers block? haha... (3) ucsd's 6 colleges mrawr?
oh well. the one thing i'm happy about is that...... all my de anza classes (i'm taking my 11th one right now) will be put to good use!! cause most of them are transferable for ge requirements ^^; .. at least for uc schools. yayay. thats some awesome stuff.
but yea. if you're wondering, i'm applying to uc berkeley, ucla, ucsd, uc riverside (?! haha yea i dunno why), usc, stanford. i'm not too sure about caltech, harvard, harvey mudd, and john hopkins (theyre all common app but have supplementary materials). i'd be interested to see if i could get in, but i dont think i would actually go. so maybe its better to save that essay time and go wushu instead. haha, whatever i'll see.
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